First post in 2010 after so many months

Hi all..this is my first ever post in 2010,after so many months being ignored.I am here to blog..is just to simply blog,and to write something up here..nothing much.I may sound a bit moody and unhappy by now,because today is my first day of period,and I am having period pain now.Everything in my mind is,NEGATIVE.

Just had some moody and unhappy talks..whatever it is I will try my best.Everytime I will feel myself so useless,so helpless,so hopeless,I don't know what I want,I don't know why am I living here,I don't know why I am being so inconsiderate,so not understanding,so not a human.After so many times when I see something that I don't wish to see,I ask myself,is this really what I want?If not,what do I want?Tired..yes,tired..I am so tired of thinking,so tired of being a human,I feel want to let go everything in my life.I can be tired also.I cannot click with everything,who is changing?What is changing?

I know whatever I am crapping here right now is just bullshit.Just bear with me,period pain is really killing me to the max and I need to do something for example typing to distract my pain and to release my frustration bla bla bla..Yes don't like it,I don't like it,I don't repeat,repetition is bullshit,but why people want to repeat?

Because they want to let the others to know what happened,and what is in their mind..they don't mean to repeat it purposely.Yes I am a frustrated girl now,I am having period pain,it's hurting me so deeply.

Arghhh pain pain pain pain pain pain pain pain pain pain pain pain.Should start drinking back "bat zan" already...pain max!